When you parent a child with life-threatening food allergies, you are often crippled by fear. I go through a never-ending cycle of emotions. I battle fear to break through and experience a small ray of hope, to have it crushed by sadness, to despair in frustration, to arrive back to a place of fear.
I have an entire list of things that I fear. Yes, I've made a list and it's not even an exhaustive one! I plan to blog through each item on my list:
Fear of the Epi-pen
Fear of restaurants (and when that fear is realized)
Fear of traveling
Fear of doctors
Fear of being misunderstood
Fear of separation
Fear of emotional damage
Fear of exclusion
Fear of the unknown
Fear of failure
Fear of the future
I have a feeling I'll never be off this emotional merry-go-round of the allergic life, but I've worked to accept our life. I'll always have a little fear, some sadness, and maybe frustration as I search to find hope. But the one thing I can have right now, the one emotion that can pervade my thoughts and remain constant, is peace.
I can have peace because I know the One who is peace. I have no idea what tomorrow holds, but I can keep slowly walking forward with the assurance that I will never walk this route alone.
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13
2 comments:
Lexi, I do feel for you. Thank goodness you know what the allergies are so you can look out for it. You make me feel so lucky that I can eat most anything. Take care.
Thanks! It is challenging but we try to be creative :)
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